Personal words

​

My journey began with a difficult childhood. Losing my mother at an early age, being bullied, and leaving my parental home at 15 to live with a friend’s family left me traumatized, confused, and searching for a way out of my suffering—though I looked in all the wrong places at first.

​

At age 12, I started smoking weed, and by 18, I entered my wildest years, discovering the techno rave scene in Amsterdam. I used substances to escape my struggles at weekend-long techno parties and festivals or during endless nights of drinking in the hospitality/nightlife industry which I worked in.

 

Eventually, I realized my problems were only getting worse. I got more anxious, more depressed, and had constant suicidal thoughts. I felt with my back against the wall, and didn't know where to look.

​

In some way, my spiritual journey began with MDMA and XTC, which opened doors in my heart that I before didn't experience so open. I showed me how much love I could feel.

 

But the true turning point came in 2015 when I stumbled upon a YouTube video on Buddhism and meditation by Koi Fresco (now Vishudda Das).

​

The Youtube thumbnail showed not an old monk in robes, but a trendy, tattooed young man from L.A. talking about meditation, which is how it sparked my curiosity.

 

As I started watching the video and he spoke about Buddhist monks using techniques to go inside their minds to resolve suffering, something clicked. I felt like I had found the answer I had been searching for.

​

A few months later, I booked a one-way flight to Bangkok and found myself meditating in a traditional Thai monastery under the guidance of a local monk and the strict schedule and discipline of monastic Buddhist life.

​

The first four days, nothing happened, and I struggled to sit for so many hours. When I was close to giving up and dropped my expectations, on day four, something happened. Sitting in front of the big Buddha in the meditation hall, I suddenly heard the jungle sounds, felt my body relax, and started to feel at peace for no reason. It was a perfectly mundane moment and, at the same time, the most powerful experience of my life. The peace stayed with me but faded after some weeks.

​

I had a temporary relapse into my old life in Amsterdam afterwards, after which I left again with a one-way flight, this time, with no plan to return.

 

Ever since, I have traveled and lived around the world, seeking a deepening of what I had tasted. This led me to spend time and study with countless teachers, monks, monasteries, and schools from various traditions: Yoga, Neo Tantra, Classical Tantra, Neo Advaita, Classical Advaita Vedanta, Tibetan Buddhism and Dzogchen, mystery schools, coaching modalities, Jungian psychology, men's work, shamanism, sacred sexuality, qigong, Ayurveda, plant medicine, pranayama/breathwork, energy work, reiki, satsangs, and coaches—I've tried everything I could find.

​

Out of all these modalities, these years have for a large part been oriented towards meditation, yoga, silent retreats, personal practice, renunciation, and withdrawal from the world. Some of these years were in India, Australia, and since 2020, Portugal. I underwent deep purging and cleansing on all levels of my being and experienced an intense energetic realignment, that by some would be known as a Kundalini process, which is an ever on-going alignment.

​

Over time, because people told me to do so, and out of a sense of calling, I've started to explore my own abilities in transmitting spiritual work through social media, coaching, meditation, yoga, retreats, and bodywork. As I witnessed the transformation and feedback of those I worked with, I proceeded. Since 2021, this has been my full-time path.

​

Teachers

​

My most important teachers all lead back to the unofficial lineage of Ramana Maharshi, a teacher who isn't alive anymore. His picture stands on my altar.

​

Some other of my most important inspirations and teachers who have taught me and transformed my journey and work include:

 

Adyashanti, from who I learned true meditation and who-although I never met him-has felt like a close mentor to me through his courses and talks.

 

Swami Atmananda Udasin from Ajatananda Ashram in Rishikesh, where I experienced Advaita beyond words in the powerful energy of the ashram and where I return yearly if I can.

 

Michaël Bijker, from who I learned pranayama breathwork and qigong and who became a good friend that I know work with on projects on his platform yogalap.

 

Surinder Singh, from who I learned Hatha Yoga, and who was a profound example of how to embody love and kindness as a Yoga teacher.

​

Chris Bale, who has had a deep influence on my path and understanding of energy.

​

Lama Lena, from who I learned Tibetan Buddhist teachings on Dzogchen Practice.

 

Ganga Mira, who made me palpably feel Ramana Maharshi's energy in her satsang and community in Portugal..

 

Ty Landrum, who I study Ashtanga-Vinyasa Yoga with since 2021.

​

I have also spend a lot of my time with the Vipassana school of S.N. Goenka, which trained me in intense Vipassana meditation, which was a powerful journey but a phase that clearly ended for me in 2022.

​

As well as, Awaken as Love, the mystery school that introduced me to the vibrant world of tantra festivals and multiple of it's Stage 1 trainings, where I am part of the faculty now.

​

And Mooji, who was the first one to help me realize Ramana Maharshi's teachings through his online transmission.

​

And mother India and her teachings, and deities. A place I deeply love, with traditions I deeply love, which has been a significant part of my growth and to which I return yearly if possible.

​

-

​

These days, I am half-based in Portugal and half-nomadic, sharing silent retreats, 1:1 mentorships, weekly Sunday live meditations, energy and bodywork sessions. You can often find me teaching at tantra festivals, month-long community experiences with Innate, or silent retreats in the Algarve.

​

Thank you for being here.