Social Media, Vulnerability & Privacy

There was a time when I would share lengthy, vulnerable posts about my processes. It was almost a trend in the social media world of self-help, spirituality, and coaching. Afterwards, I would often feel horrible.

Popular public speakers on vulnerability would say: “If you don’t feel a vulnerability hangover, like you want to hide under a stone after sharing in your public talk or social media post, you weren’t vulnerable enough.”

While these words were deeply inspiring to me before, I now see them as deeply unhealthy, leading people to harm themselves.

I still believe vulnerability is incredibly important. It’s healing, it creates connection, and it helps uproot our deepest shames and parts we want to hide. It’s necessary for our liberation.

But in the online space—where people are often scrolling during moments of disconnect and judgment, between TikToks, ads, and after a busy day—vulnerability isn’t always the same.

This kind of healing—seeing and being seen, exposing wounds and secrets—needs presence and safety. The response should be healing, especially when we’re still in the process, and not the unconscious judgments of every colleague, childhood friend, or random account.

Vulnerability belongs in sacred containers—with a beautiful group around a campfire, in a sharing circle with a talking stick and shamanic energy, with a great coach or healer, or trusted friends and loved ones. Not with anyone and everyone in any mind space.

Privacy and keeping parts of yourself to yourself doesn’t mean your ego is hiding.

Your discernment about who you share your most intimate stories with, your choice to protect your inner child, are spiritual skills and signs of wisdom—much more sacred than shouting every trauma response from the rooftops.